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I got an idea to do a story about a "Google IRL" robot froma Youtube video following the set up theme. The robot or cyborg would be something like a human laptop as to how we use Google now, but as it's shaped like a person it would also proform tasks.

It would be one of those run of the mill "Robot wants to kill/ take over the world, but can't and soon intergates into the human world while being shunned but the robots that represent it's former self/ beliefs". But, then... ZOMBIES! I was thinking of the story, and the characters were having a conversation video games. There's some mention of "What about Cave Story but with zombies instead of rabbits creators?" and it went into "I would be first in-line to become a cyborg, and fight the zombies. My phone would be my wife, Donny (formerly Google IRL) would be our son, and we would have a full zombie slaying family with on lazer eye shooting pets!"

Those exist, too. They are 2 cyborg birds that act as the home security system. The cell phone is "Sarah" (for now) and it connects to a female-shape robot body. The main protagonist the runs this curcis is loosly based off myself. More like all the stuff I want to be and do, instead what I do in reality. He's a normal human with no magic powers or anything like that. Not surprisingly very apped to tenchology, but more to software than hardware.

If I do this, I'm going to seperate from the video that inspried it more. Like instead of Google it will be MSN or Yahoo IRL. I hate monopoly. If it's anything the internet has tought us it's that "You may be hot shit now, but give it a week". Or, I could avoid product placement all together and make all my own stuff.... but that's hard, so I'm probably not going to do that. Since I thought you zombies this story is more likely to happen, but it's hard to figuer out where the zombies would come in. Or, I could make the main story and that would be a side story.

I'm going to go ahead and tell it: Some of the influence behind this is the movie "Her". Though I've yet to see it I'm all-too-familair with the base concept of "something that isn't human intergrating into the human world. "Sarah" is going to represent something of that, but I'm giving them bodies isn't for having them as objects for the sake of being able to intergate and confuse the iodea of a what we define as real. Ghost in the Shell amd Paprika are going to have ascending influence in how technology will be changing in the coruse of background events, such as people becoming cyborgs under expreimental tehconlogy, cybornitic crimes, mental healt care, and so on.

I have this thought out well enough. Ain't nothing to it, but to do it! When/ If I start it still won't be seen for a while. I usually post stories after I'm done writing the whole thing. I don't want readers to start the story, like it, get invovled, and I disappoint them by finishing it. This story story looks like something that's going to tie me in for a long haul. I'm not kidding anyone, though. It's cold outside, so I don't have anything else to do.
Current Mood: mischievousmischievous
25 September 2014 @ 09:18 pm
I was browsering art blogs and I came across a few shiney artist style blog whateverI'mtryingtosayhere, and I finally had my thought. Instead of getting angry at how this person is better than I am I said "Well, my stuff would look like that if I cared to put that much detail into it."

I've reached a new apex of my life. I've been hating my own art and other doings,in gerenal, (except my cooking) that I didn't even... it was like it was programmed into me. I had clarity in freedom in a statement that has given my agency and responisblity, while acknowegling my drawing isn't bad.

I don't hate myself, anymore. I don't blame myself for anything. I have had a break through! Something I didn't know I needed until it happened! PEACE!
Current Mood: peacefulpeaceful
14 July 2014 @ 05:31 pm
The comment you're about to read in my "reply" to this fanfic. I was going to post it directly on the blog, but I saw this: Notice! This user has turned on the option that logs your IP address when posting.
LJ, why would you even allow that feature?
Anyway, I'm posting it here, and based on what you see it's to you on reading this horrible rape fic.
I'm gonna go ahead and ruin it for you: Sonic is about to marry Tails (I like that part). Really the Blue Blur is a sick rapist and he finds a poor little female Pikachu has his victim. She shocks him once right after touching her. He get it's to cum 3 times, crack her skull twice, choke her, knock out all her teeth with a rock, spit in her, and kick dirt on her ALL WHILE RAPING HER. She somehow lives (when really she should have bled to death) and is now "pregnant" (because the writer doesn't know shit about biology), and sonic and Tails live "happily ever after".
It's bad... On top of that, it's not even written well. Grammar, spelling and all that just disregarded. Coming from ME you know it's bad.

Here's the READING of, where I found out about it. The reading skips a few sentences, so if you want the WHOLE story you have to read it yourself.

What the FUCK is wrong with you? WHAT the FUCK is WRONG with YOOOOOOOOOOOOOU?!
She should be dead. Sonic and Tails live happily ever after?
Do you hate females, or Pikachus, or what? This is a normal thing.
You don't know how biology works, either. Anthros and ferals can't reproduce together.
And, spell and grammar check BEFORE you post. I couldn't even read some of it because some of it isn't even words.
I know there's the "to each there own", and artistic expression, and I bash those, not. YOU. Something is actually wrong with you. I would rather you post stuff like this on the internet than go out and do it to a person, though.
Current Mood: irateirate
Or maybe I'm noticing the lack of variety in pinup artists. It's so easy to exploit the female figure - what with breasts and wide hips, but where are are the muscle-bound banana-dicked male figures? Where's the "Useless armor" now in MALE! And, I mostly see "men"/ males drawing said hippy, busty babes. Or cor, there's some out there, but it's not nearly enough to meet the combating ratio of g-cup titties being thrown around.

I clearly don't have anything against women, "men"/ male artists, or artist expression. I have something against the lack of variety in the "artist community". The acceptance of "male pandering" vs "OMG! Women ruin everything" when there's a sexy man or a "normal looking women/ female character" on the premises. I'll remind the community that a lot of us are also genderqueer.

I know I have no room to judge. I like to per-take in this behavior, as well. I don't draw them as busty as I use to, but i still look. And, I'm more about booty these days, or full on full figures aka "fat chicks". It's a real struggle for balance in a community that's SUPPOSE to be open to everyone. Personally, I would feel more comfortable expressing all my artist views on bodies if i didn't feel like draw something a curtain way wouldn't fit me into a box.

There's nothing wrong with women. there's nothing wrong with sexy women. There's nothing wrong with female sexuality. What's wrong is exploitation to the point where I don't bother trying to surf any popular art sites or blog sites because I'm bored of titties after 5 scrolls. Or cor, this is my opinion. I'm sure if i had just as much dick and buff chests thrown in my face as titties and wide hipped asses i wouldn't be complaining.
Current Mood: thoughtfulthoughtful
Current Music: DJ SonicFreak's Sonic 1 OST Remix - Special Stage
20 June 2014 @ 10:59 pm
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Current Mood: determineddetermined
Current Mood: deviousdevious
Current Music: Sonic Generation OST - City Escape Classic and Modern Theme
17 June 2014 @ 05:44 pm
I've decided to take a break from the creative process for a well. Nothing going on paper or in a doc until I feel like something within myself has been straightened out.

While I'm sitting her i'm looking through all the books I can access of everything I've ever done and planned. All the themes I've fallen in and out of love with, as many characters and worlds as I could think of. All the things I've liked, but never made anything out of. Where I've been, where I am, and I can't even think of where I'm going.

A lot of time has pasted, and I've more from one thing to another - as if I just enjoy the planning stage without moving on to the project stage. I've also gone through a lot of reasons why I should commit. I've lacked my desired level of "talent", I've lacked the "proper" tools. Then, it became about time and energy, and the reasons looped in the cycle. I held myself to a high either standard to dream up the ideas, and even plan for them with concept art and all, but never saw myself worthy of being able to take the project in full. I've bashed myself for doing something i love to do, for how I saw others to feel about it. I've put myself through so much for something that I should have to suffer for.

I know I've thought up alot, but most of it i don't remember now. i knew that would happen, with as much as I go through. I'm not going to let myself get distracted by the details of the older projects. I'm taking this rest to think about everything I've ever done and get to know how to apply myself to with I do.

I continue, and go from here onto...
Current Mood: contemplativecontemplative
Current Music: Sonic Generation OST - Rooftop Run Classic and Modern Theme
I thought about the stories that I posted on previously, and looked over them and it turns out... I don't want draw anything based off with I previously designed. I don't understand this feeling. This has never happened to me before. I'm in this "OH MY FUCKING SUN, WHAT HAPPENED?!" era, right now.

It's not that I don't feel like drawing, or I'm having a creativity block. I just don't wanna draw any of this! Just when I figured out something productive to do with the collection to make it worth producing it's like I don't want to, now. I somehow lose interest when i found the answer. I don't feel like writing it either.

So, I guess it's canceled. It will stay a brainbaby.
Current Mood: crushedcrushed
for a while I've been developing 3 stories with the same characters a long side each other. The first 2 stories have the same setting, but the 3rd is suppose to be something of an "AU" of the same characters. I put the stories down for a while because I just didn't gasp the focus of why I was driving the stories. Now that I look at it, it was right in front of me so I have decided to make what I originally had in my stories as underlaying themes to be overheading themes!

For the first story, I've decided to make the theme loss and grief and the different reactions to the same events. From things as small as losing items and random animal death to character death, amputations, and organ/ function loss.

For the second, the theme will be gain and the consequences of excess. I also want it to challenge the concept of "power" for whatever that means, but for the sake of plot and theme "the power of gain".

I already made the same characters dramatically different to the stories, but I didn't notice until I thought about it. For example, the first Saki has very modest behavior and prefers to be more secretive. The second Saki is very flamboyant and bombastic. The first Tennessee focuses more on being caring and displays more outlandish ideas and energetic behavior.
The second Tennessee put more time into mentioning an image to others, with out the one's very close to her knowing her real self. The first Marlin is genderqueer with an open rejection to gender roles. She's always very skinny, and is often injured. The second Merlin is a full figured femme-fatal who loves all things frilly and pastel! The first "Rolo" (I remember the name, but I forgot how to spell it) doesn't come in until later in the story and is partially invisible until they commit their final act. The second "Rolo" starts off the same, but after relieving his feelings for Merlin becomes into view. The Rolo is also there at the start of the story.

Working with the themes of loss and gain, the first story will lose character whereas the second story will gain characters from where it starts off. In the first story, the (yet the named) female that attacks Saki for "being weak" will die during the story. The the second, she will be dead when the start starts - as to why Saki and Ten will be coming in, so the gain actually starts with the story.

I'm doing this because without them the stories seems unlike-ably sallow, much made it easy to sit them aside. I want these themes to go deep, so there will be a lot of psychoanalysis going into these. There are a lot of things I don't know about the studies of human psychology, and these stories will be the best reason to me to gain more insight - at least on these issues.

As for the 3rd story the themes are going be different, in a mix and match sort of way. What happened was I noticed that it was easier to work on the 3rd story, as it had less characters - which make it easier to develop. I noticed I was building more on the AU characters, because I already handed that story something of a theme but it still needs to be worked out. I know who the characters are and I know they're doing but I'm still in the "why are they doing it, and who/ what are they doing it to?" phase.

What coming to mind with loss themes:
Constantly having the descend or being on the same low level.
Having things out of reach.
Losing things
Non-character related death (e.i.: Someone was murdered and it's on the news, but the characters don't care. It's still there, however.)
Throwing things away
Ending relationships
Unrequited love/ emotions
Always lacking something regardless of importance
Fear of gain
Losing power/ energy

What coming to mind with gain themes:
"It's better to have and not need than to need and not have."
Constantly having to ascend or being on the same high level.
Over flow
Over power
Under-minding loss
Fear of loss
Anger towards loss
Exploding into things other than just dust and pieces.

That's all I have to now. Maybe I'll starting the stories soon, now that I know what I'll be doing.
Current Mood: enthralledenthralled
Current Music: Kaada - Care
06 June 2014 @ 05:14 pm
I've recently looked at the story after having put it down for a few weeks, and it doesn't look good. It's the thing that went on too long, now. I'm not looking at quitting the story, but I will be restarting it.
As for Hoshi no Fumu, there's a lot of rewriting that needs to be done, but it will go on.
That's all for now.
Current Mood: anxiousanxious